Showing posts from October, 2007

Heroes Volume Two, Chapter Six: The Line

Claire tries out for the cheerleading squad. She doesn’t make it, even though she’s, like, so much better than the other girls, just because the mean head cheerleader is totally jealous of her. After a careful examination of Claire’s high school scenes in both this current season and the last, I’ve decided the Heroes writers were raised by wolves and thus have been forced to piece together their collective knowledge of American high schools solely from repeated viewings of She’s All That, Bring It On, and Never Been Kissed. There are many things Heroes does well. A realistic portrayal of high school life is not one of those things.

Mohinder and Monica are at the Company’s facility in upstate New York. More than his genetics know-how, or even his super-special virus-curing magic blood, this is why Mohinder is so valuable to the Company: he’s so gentle and pretty and non-threatening he can sweet-talk cute girls into accompanying him across state lines for the purposes of conducting uns…

Heroes Volume Two, Chapter Five: Fight or Flight

Molly’s still in a coma, thanks to Matt. Matt wants to stay with her, but Mohinder icily tells him to go find his father. It’s my guess Matt will return from Philadelphia to find the locks to Mohinder’s apartment changed and his belongings piled outside the door. Mohinder scoffs at Matt’s suggestion to take Molly to a hospital, proclaiming, "No hospital is equipped to deal with this." Well… maybe not, but you could give it a shot, right? Just to make sure? I mean, the kid’s in a coma… Mohinder hooks Molly up to an IV and looks after her himself. I know he has his doctorate, but he’s not an MD. I’d really feel better about this if you took her to a hospital, guys.

In the Loneliest Subplot Ever, poor forlorn Ando, stuck by himself in Tokyo, reads more of the ancient scrolls left for him by Hiro.

Heroes Volume Two, Chapter Four: The Kindness of Strangers

A strange yet satisfying episode of Heroes this week. No Peter, no Hiro, and you know what? Much as I love them both, I'm okay with that. And wonder of wonders, miracle of miracles – the Maya/Alejandro plotline gets interesting in a hurry when they, along with Derek, the American they picked up at the jail last episode, stop to help a man passed out in the middle of the road… who turns out to be Sylar. Is there nothing the addition of a brain-eating serial killer can't improve?

In Costa Verde, Mr. Bennet quietly freaks out about the painting of Claire embracing a stranger next to his bullet-riddled corpse. He gets all overprotective and paranoid and forbids Claire from dating. Claire ignores him and sneaks around with West. I shall write nothing further about this plotline until such time as odious, pompous West is unmasked as a villain. This will happen in due course, I'm pretty sure. The writers can't possibly intend for us to accept this overbearing, bullying twit …

Heroes Volume Two, Chapter Three: Kindred

Hey, look, Sylar’s back! Still recovering from his injuries, Sylar shows up in the care of the illusionist Candice (now a red-haired bombshell instead of a petite brunette) in a grimy shed in the middle of nowhere. Candice, who is most likely still working for the Company, uses her powers to transform the setting into a tropical paradise.

Three episodes into the new season, it's probably time to check in with Niki and Micah, huh? They're leaving Las Vegas after paying one final visit to D.L.'s grave. Yeah, D.L.'s dead, presumably from getting shot by Linderman last season. Niki takes Micah to New Orleans and leaves him with D.L.’s aunt (a luminous Nichelle Nichols, who's been visiting the same fountain of youth as George Takei).

Heroes Volume Two, Chapter Two: Lizards

Cork, Ireland: Peter gets interrogated by the Irish iPod bandits. He still can’t remember anything, though he still has the full spectrum of his powers. The thugs want Peter to help them with some kind of heist – in return, they’ll give him a box containing everything they found on him in the shipping crate, which might give him some clues to his identity. The teaser for next week’s episode is really playing up this "What’s in the box?" angle, but come on: this is sweet, dippy Peter we’re talking about. Five bucks says the box contains nothing more exciting than his Metro pass, a Dunkin’ Donuts punch card, and the condom he’s been carrying around since 1998.

I miss Peter’s bangs.

Heroes Volume Two, Chapter One: Four Months Later

We open in Cairo with Mohinder giving one of his standard-issue nonsensical lectures while a few bored attendees stare at the beautiful nutjob yammering on about levitation and teleportation. Post-lecture, Mohinder is wined and dined by a representative of the evil Company (Stephen Tobolowsky), who can turn objects into gold with his touch.

Hiro teleports to seventeenth-century Japan, where he finds himself in the middle of: a) an eclipse, and b) a frenzy of flying arrows. He stops time and rescues his samurai hero, Takezo Kensai, who turns out to be a drunken, ignoble English fraud (David Anders). By muddling in affairs, Hiro wreaks havoc with the timeline and alters history.

We’re introduced to two new Heroes, Honduran Wondertwins Maya and Alejandro, who are on the run. Their special abilities aren’t yet revealed, but Maya uses hers to somehow (and possibly accidentally) slaughter a truckload of fellow refugees.